Kelly Reynolds  

Hello, everyone. Today we have a special guest on the podcast. Her name is Megan Hamilton, and she is a visibility and confidence coach for women. And this is such a topic that comes up all the time with my colleagues myself. I was just explaining that I get nervous every time I do a podcast. So I love to welcome Megan, Megan, how are you today? I'm so good. Thank you for having me today. I am very excited to talk about this. I think every entrepreneur deals with these issues of confidence and things like that. We just had a recent episode where we were talking about figuring out your target market, and then feel like the next logical step there is how do you get in front of these people? And how do you not let your complete and utter terror of having to talk about people talk to people in public? Stop it? Yes, yeah,

Megan Hamilton 

It's such a big thing, especially for women entrepreneurs, because you've got so many great ideas, and you've got everything sorted out and you've done all of your work. And then somebody's like, what do you do? And you're like, Oh, um, well, I'm just like a little coach. For some people. It's sort of hard to explain and you're like, Ah, you totally lost, you know, that. Somebody asked you the question and, and you've just diminished yourself in one fell swoop. And so I see it happening a lot. And one of my favorite things is to work with clients who are entrepreneurs, to help them figure out how to do an elevator pitch, how to talk to people about your business, how to get on Instagram stories, and not feel like you're going to die.

Kelly Reynolds 

Because that's what it does feel like you feel like you're gonna die

Megan Hamilton 

Does and it's so public speaking is, you know if that's sort of a broad term, but something like 73% of people are very afraid of public speaking, and all of the different capacities that it holds. Yeah, a lot of people.

Kelly Reynolds  

So Banga, tell me about what you do and what your businesses are like? How do you help these people that are thinking they're going to die? For sure, tell them you're not going to die. That's important, probably.

Megan Hamilton 

Yeah. So I'm a speaking visibility and confidence coach. And I typically work with women, I do workshops, I have courses, and I work one on one with people. And I start off with a four part system that I developed over time that is based on my background as a classical theatre performer, and all the training that I did with that, as well as 25 years of performance. So I'm also a musician, and I've toured across my country of Canada, and I've toured into the United States. And I've put out five records. So I have a lot of experience of getting myself in front of people and doing vulnerable things. And so I start with standing using Alexander Technique, breathing, using controlled breathing, to keep you calm, and deep breathing to support a strong voice. And then speaking, using something called your optimum pitch, and then text mapping, which is a way of reading so that you are still connecting with people and not sounding like a robot, which is really difficult for a lot of people and which is what stops a lot of people from getting on stories. Because, you know, when you see someone and you see, let's say you have something really important to say, and you get on stories. And instead of sort of getting it all out in the way that you want to get it out, you ramble a little bit or you want to be a bit casual, you're not really sure how to do because there are casual stories. And then there are sort of more focused stories. And you're like, how do I do it without sounding again, like a robot? So text mapping is a way of figuring out how to say exactly what you want to say that in a way where you could connect with people instead of just sound like you're reading a script.

Kelly Reynolds 

Yeah, and you want and I know, especially when I was first starting this podcast, like trying to figure out how I did it, what would be the easiest way for me to do it. Because the first one I almost want to write the script. So I knew exactly what to say. And then I sound like an idiot, right? And then I learned that if I thought my way through it, and just when I was winging it, then I just sounded like I was all over the place. And then it was a hell of a mess to edit. You can ask my husband, because I hear about it. So realizing that it was easier to have an outline for me, is how my brain would be working so that I could talk but still stay on track, and not just wander all over the place.

Megan Hamilton Yes. So I mean, preparation is essential in getting up and doing something that's going to be hard for you. And so a lot of times what happens, and I'm guilty of this too, is you know you have this thing coming out. You know what the date is, you know how much time you have to prepare for this thing. And as entrepreneurs, we're organized. You can't do this unless you have figured out how to manage your time. And yet, we just keep putting it out to bid scary and going there, it doesn't feel good. And then it's the night before and you are like, aggressively writing this script that doesn't have the space to breathe, and you know, the chance to be edited properly, and you haven't spent any time with it. And then you go, and you read it to a big group of people. And it's just not what you wanted to do. And you've lost an opportunity that you could have had if you had just done it a little bit earlier when you knew it was coming.

Kelly Reynolds  

And I feel like a lot of times the things that come out of our minds the first time they you're like, Oh, I forgot about that partner, oh, when you read it back to yourself, oh, I definitely want to make sure I cover this or like all of that kind of stuff that like two days later you think back like, Oh, no, this is the thing I really need to talk about. So having that prep time to really get your message across. And then you're not like a high school kid trying to write the report the night before you know, the test or whatever. Either way, the panic does not help anything.

Megan Hamilton 

The panic makes everything worse. And you know, like, there's so many reasons why we procrastinate things, but it's almost always fear. And like those who want to invite that kind of anxiety into your bloodstream, when you can just keep putting it off a little bit, you know, you're going to be anxious, just do it later.

Megan Hamilton 

The thing is, You know, once so preparation is essential for anything like this. And that's why we have the system so that you know what to do. So it's not just sort of, I don't even know where to start. This is really scary. And I'm trying to even focus and I can't even write this speech, because the idea of getting up in front of people or getting on a zoom call, or having to talk about myself is so petrifying that I can't even think clearly to write this thing. And so we talked about different ways that I talked about control breathing. That's a method you can use in order to clear your brain, yet calm, feel a little bit more in control and not feel like your emotional stress mode is getting a better view.

Kelly Reynolds  

Yeah, I mean, Bonnie, and I think knowing that you're gonna have to just work through these things. A lot of people tell me, well, I'm scared. That's not my thing. And I'm like, No, that's not what that tells you. Like, if you're scared, it means you haven't done it before. That's all that's telling you. Like, you know, they think, Oh, well, that's just not my path. I think that I think of it as getting a vibe or whatever. I'm like, No, no, it's all scary. It's always gonna be scary, like this business thing is hard. You have to do all this stuff.

Megan Hamilton 

It's not scary. You need to make it scary. Because you're not pushing yourself hard enough. That's what I say. And I don't want to say that as though like, you need to push yourself like, like, Don't sleep and like, No, no, but do bad things. I just mean, you got to be nudging yourself forward, and it's always gonna feel uncomfortable. And the second it feels comfortable is the second year like, damn it.

Megan Hamilton 

I gotta get into it again.

Kelly Reynolds  

Yeah, that's Yeah, I totally agree. And that this has been an exercise in this. I don't, I'm much better talking to live people than I am to recordings. I don't know if it's that I feel like a well, these people are in this room and the recordings are out into the world. I'm not sure what that thing is. But I could get in front of 100 people in a room easier than it's me and a microphone. So it's always these little intricacies of like what wigs you out, you know, like, like, it makes it all crazy. Totally. I coached the CFO of a really big tech company. And he said to me, I can get up in front of a group of 1000 people and just talk to them. And I'm totally fine. I feel really comfortable. And, I do a great job. When I have to get up and read a speech. I freak out. I sound like a robot. I don't sound like myself. So I just like to think I'm so much better if I'm off the cuff than if I'm reading.

Megan Hamilton 

And I say that's just because you don't know how to read well yet. But like this is a skill we can learn.

Yes. And so people think that there's no possible way that you're going to get up and read actual text and sound good doing it. And I always say do you think that Barack Obama would just get up there and like wing it? Do you think that his hour-long speeches were just like coming straight out of his head?

Kelly Reynolds  

There are some highly-paid people who find those people writing that out like weeks before whatever he was speaking at, and he was just very, very good. Delivering. And that is what all of us can do. If we just put in a little bit of time and learn different techniques to get there,

Kelly Reynolds 

Do you think I feel like a lot of people want to have confidence before they go out and do something? And I kind of feel like the confidence comes from doing. Confidence is a byproduct. So I always say to people, if a coach tells you that they are going to teach you how to be confident just run away, because that's not nobody can teach you that. That is you. learning things, learning skills, practicing those skills, and having the confidence from practicing them, and knowing how it works. And getting out there and doing it. And so I can give you all the skills that you need. And I can tell you how to gently nudge yourself forward. But only you are going to build your own confidence.

Kelly Reynolds  

Yes, see listeners out there, we talk about this a lot. Best of all, you can't just buy a course and be successful. It's the thing that you do that makes this all work.

Megan Hamilton 

Yep, you get out what you put in. And I say that for everything I do when I'm working one on one with people, if I'm teaching a course, I'm like, you got to show up for yourself. And you have to commit to this, because it's not just some kind of panacea, that's going to make you a better speaker, like you have to commit to the uncomfortable thing anxiety that's going to come from slowly nudging yourself into the abyss.
Kelly Reynolds 

Totally, I feel like I've been hearing a lot lately. I'm a direct certified director of operations. And there are a lot of people that are going through this certification. And they're building their businesses or people coming from corporate after getting laid off or something and then having this new business, and they're putting all these things together, and they've got their website and all the things that you need. But jumping off point and getting in front of people seems to be a big hurdle. Getting in front of you doesn't mean like that, that terror, confidence, what are all the other stuff? What should people start thinking about? Or where should they start on that kind of journey of getting in front of the people they know that they want to work with?

Megan Hamilton 

Okay, so the first, I would say start with the thing that I always start with, which is standing. So you're basically learning how to carry your body in space. And it's using a technique called the Alexander Technique, which has been around for over 100 years. There's lots of research and studies on it. And essentially, it's almost like standing in Mountain Pose. For those of us who are familiar with yoga, it is a very open and very grounded way of standing that allows energy to flow through you, but also opens you up and allows you to take really deep and supportive breaths. And I've told this story before, but I haven't told it to you, where I was working at a job where I had sort of really aggressive people coming at me all the time with their like, you know, big emotional issues that were happening. And it was like, they would just come to me venting like halfway down the hall, they're starting to vent, and it was so much work to just deflect this constantly. And, you know, at one point, I was like this woman was coming in, I was like, oh, not again, and I just, you know, wasn't really feeling it that day. And I thought I knew what to do. I stood up, I rolled myself up into Alexander Technique, basically Alexander stance. And she was like, what is happening. And she just started to stop and she changed her voice, she calmed down. And she started speaking to me like a normal person and yelled at me like I was some kind of fence post. And all I did was roll up into what I call Alexander stance. And so there are Alexander coaches out there who are really, really good at their job and do a whole lot of stuff with you and have hands on and stuff. I have Alexander training. I'm not an Alexander coach, but I've been given permission to teach this sort of basic way of ending. And it can be converted to sitting as well. And it just, it's like, you're not doing much, except for moving your muscles. But from the outside eye. It's like, Whoa, what's happening is taking up so much sort of energy and space and people really feel it. So you just start with that and you won't you also feel it yourself. You know, we react to other people's reactions to us and and so I think even with this person, I watched her shift and I was like, oh, oh, that's fantastic. Yeah, it's so it's so cool. And so you set yourself up that way just by Starting off, and so you're starting off with a lot of strength. And then the second thing that's really important is to practice control breathing. So, control breathing is when you decide how you're going to take breath in, and take breath out, it's as simple as that. So usually your body takes care of that. We don't really think about our breathing, it manages it for us. But when we start to get into stress mode, which is what we commonly call it fight flight or freeze. Your brain is thinking, you're in danger, and it's sending chemicals into your bloodstream. And, you know, cortisol and adrenaline and telling you that you are, you gotta get out of there like something, something bad's gonna happen to you, which we all know is not actually true. And the quickest way to stop that from happening is to practice controlled breathing. So when you do that, you're sending a signal to your brain that you're not in fight flight or freeze mode. And your brain automatically goes, Oh, okay, cool, stops shooting the stress hormones into your body, and allows you to calm down a little bit, and be able to focus because when you're in that high stress mode, and I was talking about this before, so part of what's what stops people from wanting to write their speeches, is you're thinking about having to get up in front of people. And that is putting you in stress mode, which clouds your brain, it doesn't let you think properly, it makes your heart race and it does all kinds of I mean, I've got this list that I downloaded it is three pages with two or three columns, of just bullet points of all of the things that can happen to your body when you are in stress mode. Wow. I mean, it is really extensive. And sometimes people don't even realize, oh, like I didn't realize that's what that was blushing, like sweating, racing, heartbeats having to go to the bathroom excessively, like all of these things. And so you actually can control that by just practicing controlled breathing. It's as simple as that. And people don't believe me, and I'm like, just try it. Like, wow, this is changing my life. And that's, that's amazing.

Kelly Reynolds

And it's so simple thing. But yes, I mean, I tend to I'm a worrier. I like to worry about things that are never gonna happen. Things that might happen, the probably like, I love to worry, I think I've had my jaw cleanse for about a month with a whole bunch of things that were going on, and kind of just homeschooling has been really fun. And that kind of like and breathing, breathing. That's when I'm like, oh, and I'll realize that I have a huge headache, because I've been clenching my jaw for the last two hours. And I didn't even realize that I was stressed out and it's come different, comes out in different ways. And that's when I'm like, okay, you need to take a breath and get out of this chair, walk outside. I love to go out in the garden for that. That's one of my favorite things about working from my house, I can go outside and go, you know, pick some weeds or do whatever and then come back in and

Megan Hamilton 

Get that break. Really, it's such a good idea if you get yourself past. So the cool thing about practicing control breathing is once you know about it, you know how to manage it. And when you feel that sort of anxiety rising and you feel yourself going into that place, you know, to sort of stop it from getting to a certain point. Sometimes it happens more quickly than you think it's going to or sometimes you're just generally an anxious person and it takes years for you to be able to sort of curb this response and so you're you're absolutely right, the first thing you can do like getting outside, going for a walk like burning some of it off going into your garden, being in nature. Those are really important things if you can manage them. I read somewhere that one of the best things you can do on the day you're giving a speech is go for a run in the morning and just like

Kelly Reynolds  

Burn it all off. We call it burning off the bad juju. Like you got to just like right

Megan Hamilton 

I don't know about you. I find Bad Juju and good Juju. Very similar. So yes, I'm recording podcasts with people I get so interested in. And then like when it's done I need to burn that off. Haha, so energized. Yeah, exactly.

Kelly Reynolds 

You know what I'm talking about, I usually walk inside. I walk inside my husband's in there right now with my son and and I'll walk in and be like, he's like, Whoa, cuz you're so wound up doing everything right?

Megan Hamilton 

Yeah, I'm doing that to him with that with the ex-colleague yesterday to me. Oh, totally.

Kelly Reynolds 

As you were, as you were telling that story, like I totally do that all day. I just came in from that, like 10 minutes ago.

Megan Hamilton 

Oh my gosh, that's too funny. It's funny, knowing that I think is really good too. And, and trying to just reverse it a little bit before you inflict that upon somebody else is always always nicer.

Kelly Reynolds  

I'll walk in sometimes and they're like, I need a minute, I need to get this out. I'm sorry, I have to throw it to you. And he's like, okay, go get it. Oh, but I try not to, like, I don't, I don't like to have all that bad kind of vibe, when you're walking around all the time, it gets so much to take. And when someone's bombarding you with that, I feel like you're absorbing it all. And then you have to deal with it. And it's really, it's a lot like when your clients are being crazy, like, my clients are being crazy. You know, like, all that kind of stuff. And there is such a bombardment of all this stuff that, Oh, I just started almost feeling nauseous. From all of it.

Megan Hamilton 

Yeah, yeah. Well, you are like, you are likely a sensitive person. And so you're absorbing what's being thrown at you, because that's just sort of how your body operates. But learning, you know, all the different ways that you can counter it. That's awesome. And you do them and then it's gone. As opposed to trying to pretend that you're not like that and ignoring it. Right? Yeah. Not turning into a whole other problem. Right?

Kelly Reynolds 

Yeah, well, I'm here and my husband will say that he knows when I'm really stressed out, because he'll just hear me taking a lot of deep breaths from the other side of the couch. He like, okay, okay. Gotta get out of it. I'll be alright. Um, so, obviously, this whole idea of confidence and getting out in front of people and talking to people. When you don't have the confidence in yourself, there's a lot of talk about fake it till you make it. Is that something that you think is helpful? Or do you think that there is a better way to do it?

Megan Hamilton 

I'm really not into it. Here's the thing. And this is what I mean, when I say if a coach tells you, they're gonna teach you confidence, like you got to go, because as human beings, we know when people are messing with us, and when people are not being real. And so there's two sides to this. Sometimes people mistake bravado for good leadership. Yeah,

Kelly Reynolds  

I was on wall street for 12 years. Yeah.

Megan Hamilton

People will say, oh, that person is so confident. They're not. This is a persona that they have adopted in order to adapt to the situation that they're in, as opposed to, you know, when you can think of the best boss you've ever had. They were probably authentic, a little bit vulnerable. We're not afraid to say, Oh, I don't really know what you're talking about. Could you explain that to me, instead of just being like, Yeah, I know it.

Kelly Reynolds  

Yeah. And you know, like, you can come to them and talk to them and bring the issues to them. And it's not just my way or the highway.

Megan Hamilton 

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. So we've all had bad bosses, I'm sure because man I have. So go out there shaky. Because that is going to be better in the long run. If you want to be a happy and real person, you get to pick. You can adapt whatever sort of crappy persona that you think is going to get you somewhere and it might, but you're never going to be going out there as yourself. Feeling Okay, about being you, you're just going to be some version of yourself that isn't actually even true. And people will know that. So there's all this like, weird, like, you talked about working on Wall Street. And you know, I came from a university situation. There's this weird, like, people feel like they need to be something when really you actually just need to be yourself. You just have to have some skills to be able to present yourself in a way that people will get

Kelly Reynolds 

Some sense, it totally makes sense. To fake it till you make a thing. I'm always like, no, that is I really don't think that's the right way to go. You just have to decide that you're gonna be shaky at first and that's fine, because that is right.

Kelly Reynolds 

Like, it's okay to be uncomfortable. Yeah, like, I think most people are like, What? I'm not comfortable. I want this discomfort to stop. How can I make it stop and learn that it's okay to be like in a cold sweat sometimes because you're doing this thing like it's okay.

Megan Hamilton 

Not only is it okay, but it is essential. And so I talked about something called sitting in your shit. And you can edit that if you need to think about language. You sit in it, you sit in your uncomfortability and you figure out what it's telling you. Because that is really important information. And you work through it, instead of deflecting it, putting it aside for later shoving it down? No, because it's good for you.

Kelly Reynolds  

I feel like if you're shoving it down, it's just gonna keep popping through and usually at the most inconvenient time possible,

Megan Hamilton 

Right? Absolutely, exactly like when you're trying to be authentic. And so I just built a whole course around something called Shadow Work, which is where you learn about the deep secrets that you hope that nobody finds out about you or you know, the bad behavior that you've had in the past that you've just sort of glossed over all of these sort of negative pieces of ourselves that we just shoved down. Because if you are afraid of getting up in front of other people, it's because you feel like they're going to figure out your secret. That makes a lot of sad things about you. And so when you own that, when you sit in it, and you're like, yep, I have been a bad person before. Here's what I did. And I totally did it. And then pass that. Why did I do that? What was I tried to protect about myself? So you go through, like, admitting to the thing to having compassion for yourself without the thing. And then the thing is part of you, and you're okay with that. And it does matter, people know, because you figured out how to be okay with it. And then you actually become a better leader, you become more authentic when you get in front of people and things don't bother you as much because you don't have the same fear about them.

Kelly Reynolds  

Yeah, I mean, knowing why I think is a huge thing. Like, why did I do this? Was I scared of something that I needed to get away from this thing? figuring out what you're scared of, like, there are certain things you're like, I'm scared of doing this, because it's dangerous. And then there's other things you're just like, I'm scared of, like driving off a cliff like, but like being scared to record a podcast that I know, could really be great for my business. That's it, there's a difference, you know, and like, why am I so scared of this? You know, like figuring that out? And then figuring out okay, well, is it because I'm scared that I'm going to be really successful? Well, that's a different problem. You know, like, what if my whole world changes because I make a billion dollars next year? Well, it's, that seems dumb. But I feel like there's a lot of times in my head where I was worried that I realized that I was being scared about something, not because I was scared of the thing, but because I was worried that it would cause conflict between me and my husband. And then figuring that out, then I was like, well, this is dumb. And I talked to him about it. And then that's not an issue before anymore. So kind of figuring out that like root cause of why you're so scared of it has been a huge help for me, like working through all those

Megan Hamilton 

totally. And if you had just burned past it and been like, okay, doesn't matter, I have to get out here and do it, you would never have learned that. And you would never have sort of eased into yourself a bit more, you'd always have this weird fear that you couldn't figure out,

Kelly Reynolds  

because you can look at it. And I think a lot of people, when they're building businesses, it's so much about what other people think of them.

Megan Hamilton 

Like, as women, that is, it's just a constant thing.

Kelly Reynolds  

And especially like, if you've come from corporate, right, like we've had male dominated industries you come from, you're not taught to be confident. You're taught to stop being so bossy, and maybe do your job. So when you have that background, that's totally, but like, if you then you're coming into like having your own business, and you've been told to shut up for so long. Finding the confidence to be able to say, I can do this is such a big jumps for a lot of people. It was for me, and I'm loud and obnoxious. So coming from someone who is maybe nervous all the time, and then trying to be confident on that. After that wasn't your conditioning, it's realizing that and then trying to work through it.

Megan Hamilton 

Yeah. Well, and I think, again, like you said, trying to be confident, and I think that's a lot more it messes us up a little bit as well. Because you're trying to put yourself out there to build confidence. Do you know what I mean? Trying to be confident, that is putting on some kind of mask of whatever you fake, this looks like. What you're doing is you're trying to get out there, you're using the tools that you've been given to do a good job. And you'll feel the confidence that comes with it afterwards. If you you know, for whatever feedback you get, or just knowing that you did it sometimes for a lot of people just going up there and doing the thing and like being like, I can't believe

Kelly Reynolds  

I didn't die. Yeah, I didn't die. And like I actually was pretty okay. Yeah, usually that is a huge leap for people. It's just doing the thing. Yes, do the thing. People just do the thing, right? Do it. Just do it. Yeah, I've been saying this for the last 24 episodes. And are 26 episodes where we are, but see someone else saying to you? No.

Megan Hamilton 

Yeah, I will say this. And I've written about this a little bit, people tell you to get out there and do the thing, right? And you're like, I really want to, I have no idea how. And so that's where this, you know, for, for my purposes in this specific area that we're talking about in terms of like speaking or getting out there and doing something, this is where the system comes into it, because this is how you do it. Right? Yes, you get up there, you stand like this, you do your breathing ahead of time you speak using your optimum pitch, which again, is not changing how your voice is, we're not trying to sound a certain way for anybody's benefit. Certainly not ours. We are trying to use a resonant and powerful voice, because that affects people and also happens to be the most beneficial way for you to speak. So, you know, if you've been on zoom all day, sometimes you lose your voice, and you're just like what's going on. And because we're sitting, we're not allowing ourselves to have nice, big deep breaths in and we're like messing with our voices. And so using your full voice allows you to be the least damaging as well. That's interesting. These are the things I know everything about. But my favorite thing is that all of this stuff happens to be the most beneficial for both your body and how you present yourself, like how other people take you in. And I like that because we're not expecting any kind of like I was saying before bravado or falseness you're not doing anything, right arming you to do a good job. In fact, everything you're doing is beneficial to you. And also helps you do the good job.

Kelly Reynolds 

Yeah, you're not being a jerk like you could be. You can ask for something clearly, and not be a jerk about it. Like you don't have to. I think a lot of people think that like running a company, you have to be kind of almost a bully. And I feel like that doesn't work at all. Right? Well, except that that is what has been the traditional model. Yeah.

Megan Hamilton 

And, you know, what we're finding, I think, is this sort of new leadership   that are evolving and are becoming really popular these days, which I'm so into, that involves emotional intelligence that involves, you know, being authentic and, and putting yourself out there and not being afraid to be vulnerable in front of your staff. Because that's what strong leadership is. And you know, that you have an authentic relationship with people instead of a fear based relationship with people, which

Megan Hamilton 

Yes, that's for everybody.

Kelly Reynolds  

Yeah, I mean, when I was starting to build up my agency and starting to hire people, I'd never really managed anyone, I'd run operations for lots of things and handled like lots of money, but like, never really had like a team that I managed. And I was really, I had a lot of confidence issues, like, Oh, I'm not gonna know how to do that. And I think I mean, especially coming from Wall Street, there's that bravado model that you almost have in your head, I'm like, I don't want to be that person. And then, like, you start working with people, and you're like, Okay, I'm gonna ask you to do some things, and you're gonna do them, it's gonna be great. And then like, having that like, simple thing, and they're like, and now I can come to my team ago, I need help on this and they are ready to help. You know, it's such a different working relationship, then I'm the boss, which was not me. I was never gonna be like that. But like, I also just want like, look at how that has served us globally. Right now at this particular point in time. Yeah, a lot of bravado is happening. Yeah, I'll just have a global pandemic, and people dying and all kinds of things. And it's just not working. And I think we're really starting and now that we see an alternate, you know, leadership style, where it's okay to be yourself. It's okay. Yeah. Ricky, it's okay to like, mess up and apologize for it. Yeah, like not having to be perfect all the time. Especially, you know, especially in this like, social media Instagram world where everything looks perfect all the time. And I mess up idioms and sayings all the time. Like, I can never get them right. And Brian has left them in every podcast because he thinks it's hysterical. But at the same time, like, every time I mess with you make sure to leave it in. But like at the same time, like I love it, because it's, it's not perfect. None of it's perfect, but like I want, like this whole podcast was trying to help other business owners when the whole apocalypse happened. And everyone was kind of like, What the hell's going on. It was kind of this whole idea of don't panic, we can figure this out over and over again. So I don't want to be a person who is presenting a perfect image, because I don't think that helps anyone's confidence. Right? And it's not real. It's not. It's such an exhausting thing to keep upright.

Megan Hamilton  

Yeah, well, and that's what I mean. I mean, like you got to decide to have To time, how are you going to go into this? Do you want to keep up some kind of disguise for the rest of your life? It's exhausting. It's right. So just go into it. knowing you're going to be a dork and that's fine. Yeah, like,

Kelly Reynolds  

I'm way too on with summer person because I could never keep track of all the lies if I was lying. That's exhausting. Like, yeah.

Megan Hamilton 

And, or even just having to think about like, well, how am I going to answer this? What? What's the boss's way of answering this? Like? Yes.

Kelly Reynolds 

How would we answer this in this context?

Megan Hamilton 

Yes. Because like speaking, it is important to think about things before you say them. That's sort of not what I'm implying. But I mean, you know, to figure out how you're right. It's exhausting. It's, it's, it's absurd. It's unnecessary. Yeah, it has created this weird leadership model that has messed everybody up. And we have to start being comfortable with being who we are. Which, by the way, if you get to my point in life, like, that can take a while. Because we've been taught to, yeah, be different. And yeah, I mean, okay.

Kelly Reynolds  

I grew up in a very female-centric family. There was like, girls can do anything. So I come from that in some ways. So I'm maybe more confident in some ways, and other people would have that, that have always been told their whole lives. Um, so we all come with our own thing, right? None of us have to figure this out. None of us. Right, and we're just working on it. So I feel like that's the whole point, right? Like, if you're out there, and you're trying to do this, just keep doing this and just keep figuring it out. Because that's all we're doing. Yeah. And that's the other thing. There's no like, end point. It's like, Okay, I'm going to keep going until we get to x, and then that'll be done. It's like, no, you're either always growing, or else you're stuck. Yeah. And both feel yucky. Sometimes. Yeah, like being stuck, feels yucky. And trying new things feels yucky. That's true. But yeah, but wouldn't you be if you're gonna feel yucky either way? Wouldn't you try to like do some cool things? Yes. Go for growth. Yeah. I totally agree. Alright, so where can we find you?

Megan Hamilton 

You can find me, my website is www.ubuskills.com. So it's the letters UBU. Awesome.

Kelly Reynolds  

And I will put all this stuff in the show notes as well. So we can find Megan,

Megan Hamilton 

And I'm on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook, all with UBU skills?

Kelly Reynolds 

Awesome. Is there anything else you'd like these lovely people to know about you?

Megan Hamilton 

Um, I have a free public speaking guide that people get, if they want to sign up for my newsletter, they'll have it sent straight to their inbox. And you can get that from my website. And I am like, really approachable. And so if you follow me on Instagram and send me a DM, I'm always going to reply. Same with email. I love talking to people that are building relationships. And so if you've got questions, hit me up with them, because I really geek out on this stuff. And I love talking about ways to help you.

Kelly Reynolds  

I could sit here and talk to you all day, frankly. I was like, how long have we been on here? I've completely forgotten the time. Like, three hours later, to talk to you about confidence. Right? It's like I get so excited about it. Because once you start feeling good about one thing like you, it's so exciting. Like it's so exciting, right? Like you're like I could do anything and then there's just like the next day you may feel like hell but like those moments of Oh my God, I could rule the world right now. Yeah, are so worth all of the fear of it.

Megan Hamilton 

So I could do this all day. Do that for you. Yeah, yeah. I really enjoy talking to people and having conversations. Recording podcasts is very enjoyable for me. Yeah.

Kelly Reynolds 

Well, thank you so much, Megan. I have had such a great time today talking to you. So everyone, Megan Hamilton, I will put up skills and all of the contact information in the show notes. You can go check her out. And go talk to me about confidence because why wouldn't you? And exactly. Thank you, Megan. Thank you and everyone else. I will talk to you guys next week.